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by: Ana Flores
Last summer we took our children
to Storybook Gardens. It was our first time there and we truly
enjoyed ourselves. As we explored the grounds, we came to
the last section: the large climbers and slides!
We each managed to keep up with one of our
two children up and down the pirate ship, through its nooks
and crannies and down various slides. My husband went down
the huge, three-story tube slide with my daughter several
times, encouraging me to, “try it – it’s
fun!” I smiled and nodded, gracefully opting out of
that monster tube slide that made my heart race at the mere
sight of it.
My then almost-two-year old son merrily
walked up and down the three flights of stairs to the platform
and entrance of that monstrous tube slide. The second trip
up the stairs ended with him peering down the hole, smiling
at the attendant and scurrying down the stairs again. An eager
dad smiled at me and chuckled saying, “You’re
going to have to go down it sooner or later!”
The third time was the charm for my son.
He went to the opening of that behemoth slide and said, “Down
mommy. DOWN!” I glanced at the attendant who said, “You
have to go with him. He’s too small to go alone.”
“He’s too small to go and I’m too scared
to go”, I thought. “Okay – here goes”,
I said. That same dad who had been doing the same circuit
with his 5 year old daughter laughed.
My son sat in the slide and I sat behind
him, bracing him with my feet pressing on the sides of the
slide to slow our descent – and, of course, my heart
in my throat! For what seemed to be a long, long time, all
I could see was bright red plastic, my feet pressing against
the side of the slide and my son’s curly head of hair.
When we popped out of the tube at the bottom
my body tingled with exhilaration, fear and that, thank goodness
that’s over, feeling.
You have entered motherhood; you are now
a different person – at least in some ways. Yes, yes,
it’s about changing life roles and with that, responsibilities
– but more so, it’s about changing who you are;
you the woman, the individual. Adjusting to this life change
can take some soul searching and daily perseverance.
You overcome your fears…and develop
new ones.
You know what I’m talking about. Whether
it’s a new-found ability to deal with vomit, the infamous
“multi-tasking” – listening to two, three,
four children at the same time, catering to their needs, while
preparing a meal or worse, while driving them somewhere, your
new “yelling voice” or that all too familiar but
unwelcomed sense of frustration that leaves you shaking, you
are now different.
The best part of all of this, is, of course,
the rest of it. The un-prompted, out of the blue, Mommy, I
love you’s, the hug that is really a tackle, the day
you walk in on your older child helping the younger one and
the day they each discover themselves – their love of
fire trucks, their sense of rhythm or their uncanny ability
to help out.
As you go through your day, be it a good
day or not-so-good day, and sometimes ask yourself how you
got here…think of who you were before children, who
you are now, and how those two women connect. You can develop
strategies to manage the day to day ups and downs of motherhood.
Reconnecting with yourself is a positive way to stay true
to your values, parent consciously and rejuvenate your sometimes
weary self.
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COLUMNIST
Ana is an Occupational Therapist and Life
Coach with a passion for the health and well-being
of women and mothers, and for enabling others to lead
fulfilled lives. She consults to lawyers and insurers
about the functional and rehabilitation needs of accident
victims. Ana is the founder of WomanMpowered,
a company providing occupational therapy and life coaching
services to enable women to empower themselves. She lives
in Oakville with her husband Rodney, daughter Aquinnah
and son Nathaniel. www.WomanMpowered.com |
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